【西洋·字花 编者按】
《拉撒路夫人》(Lady Lazarus, 一译为《女拉撒路》)一诗是美国著名“自白派”诗人西尔维娅·普拉斯(Sylvia Plath)的作品。(注:拉撒路为《圣经》人物,经历过死而复活。普拉斯在此诗中把自己比作女拉撒路,以喻自己企图自杀失败后的“死而复活”。)
Lady Lazarus (1962)
By Sylvia Plath
I have done it again.
One year in every ten
I manage it--
A sort of walking miracle, my skin
Bright as a Nazi lampshade,
My right foot
A paperweight,
My face a featureless, fine
Jew linen.
Peel off the napkin
O my enemy.
Do I terrify?--
The nose, the eye pits, the full set of teeth?
The sour breath
Will vanish in a day.
Soon, soon the flesh
The grave cave ate will be
At home on me
And I as miling woman.
I am only thirty.
And like the cat I have nine times to die.
This is Number Three.
What a trash
To annihilate each decade.
What a million filaments.
The peanut-crunching crowd
Shoves in to see
Them unwrap me hand and foot--
The big strip tease.
Gentlemen, ladies
These are my hands
My knees.
I may be skin and bone,
Nevertheless, I am the same, identical woman.
The first time it happened I was ten.
It was an accident.
The second time I meant
To last it out and not come back at all.
I rocked shut
As a seashell.
They had to call and call
And pick the worms off me like sticky pearls.
Dying
Is an art, like everything else.
I do it exceptionally well.
I do it so it feels like hell.
I do it so it feels real.
I guess you could say I've a call.
It's easy enough to do it in a cell.
It's easy enough to do it and stay put.
It's the theatrical
Come back in broad day
To the same place, the same face, the same brute
Amused shout:
'A miracle!'
That knocks me out.
There is a charge
For the eyeing of my scars, there is a charge
For the hearing of my heart--
It really goes.
And there is a charge, a very large charge
For a word or a touch
Or a bit of blood
Or a piece of my hair or my clothes.
So, so, Herr Doktor.
So, Herr Enemy.
I am your opus,
I am your valuable,
The pure gold baby
That melts to a shriek.
I turn and burn.
Do not think I underestimate your great concern.
Ash, ash--
You poke and stir.
Flesh, bone, there is nothing there--
A cake of soap,
A wedding ring,
A gold filling.
Herr God, Herr Lucifer
Beware
Beware.
Out of the ash
I rise with my red hair
And I eat men like air.
拉撒路夫人(1962)
彭予译
我又尝试了一次,
我十年
尝试一次——
一种神通广大的奇迹,我的皮肤
发亮,象纳粹的灯罩,
我的右脚
是一块镇纸,
我的脸没有五官,一块
上等犹太亚麻布,
揭开那条餐巾
哦,我的敌人
我可怕吗?——
鼻子,眼洞,两排牙齿?
酸臭的气味
会在一天之内消失,
被墓穴吞吃的
肉体会很快回到
我身上,很快;
我是一个笑容可掬的女人,
我仅仅三十岁,
我象猫一样有九条性命,
这是第三条
每十年就要消灭
一个废物!
一百万根纤维!
一群人嚼着花生
挤进来看
他们剥光我的手和脚——
一次盛大的脱衣舞会,
先生们,女士们,
这是我的手,
我的膝,
我也许瘦得只剩下一把骨头,
但我还是原来的那个女人,同一个女人,
第一次发生在十岁,
那是一次意外,
第二次是我有意
要干出个明堂,根本不愿回头,
我摇晃着,紧闭着,
象一枚海贝,
他们呼呀唤呀,
把我身上的虫挑出象挑粘粘的珍珠,
死
是一种艺术,象一切其他的东西。
我干这个非常在行,
我这样干使自己感到死是地狱,
我这样干使自己感到真死,
我猜想你们会说我身负某种使命,
在小屋里死特别容易。
死特别容易,一动不动,
这是在光天化日之下
戏剧性的归来,
回到原来的地方,回来那张脸,原来残忍的
有趣的叫喊:
"一个奇迹!"
他打垮了我。
人们冲过来
为了看我脸上的伤疤,人们冲过来
为了听我的心跳——
它真的去了,
人们冲过来,很多人冲过来,
为了说句话或摸一摸
或几滴血
或我的一根头发或我的衣服,
也好,医生先生,
也好,敌人先生,
我是你的作品,
我是你宝贵的,
溶化为一声尖叫的
纯金的婴儿,
我扭动着,燃烧着,
别以为我低估了你无微不至的关怀,
灰烬,灰烬——
你戳着,拨着,
肉,骨头,无踪无影——
一块肥皂,
一只结婚戒指,
一种金的填塞物,
上帝先生,魔鬼先生,
当心
当心,
我披着一头红发
从灰烬中升起,
象呼吸空气一样吃人。
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