悲观有一样好处，它能叫人把事情都看轻了一些。这个可也就是我的坏处，它不起劲，不积极。您看我挺爱笑不是?因为我悲观。悲观，所以我不能扳起面孔，大喊：“孤——刘备!”我不能这样。一想到这样，我就要把自己笑毛咕了。看着别人吹胡子瞪眼睛，我从脊梁沟上发麻，非笑不可。我笑别人，因为我看不起自己。别人笑我，我觉得应该;说得天好，我不过是脸上平润一点的猴子。我笑别人，往往招人不愿意;不是别人的量小，而是不象我这样稀松，这样悲观。
我打不起精神去积极的干，这是我的大毛病。可是我不懒，凡是我该作的我总想把它作了，总算得点报酬养活自己与家里的人——往好了说，尽我的本分。我的悲观还没到想自杀的程度，不能不找点事作。有朝一日非死不可呢，那只好死喽，我有什么法儿呢?
这样，你瞧，我是无大志的人。我不想当皇上。最乐观的人才敢作皇上，我没这份胆气。
有人说我很幽默，不敢当。我不懂什么是幽默。假如一定问我，我只能说我觉得自己可笑，别人也可笑;我不比别人高，别人也不比我高。谁都有缺欠，谁都有可笑的地方。我跟谁都说得来，可是他得愿意跟我说;他一定说他是圣人，叫我三跪九叩报门而进，我没这个瘾。我不教训别人，也不听别人的教训。幽默，据我这么想，不是嬉皮笑脸，死不要鼻子。
也不是怎股子劲儿，我成了个写家。我的朋友德成粮店的写帐先生也是写家，我跟他同等，并且管他叫二哥。既是个写家，当然得写了。“风格即人”——还是“风格即驴”?——我是怎个人自然写怎样的文章了。于是有人管我叫幽默的写家。我不以这为荣，也不以这为辱。我写我的。卖得出去呢，多得个三块五块的，买什么吃不香呢。卖不出去呢，拉倒，我早知道指着写文章吃饭是不易的事。
稿子寄出去，有时候是肉包子打狗，一去不回头;连个回信也没有。这，咱只好幽默;多喒见着那个骗子再说，见着他，大概我们俩总有一个笑着去见阎王的，不过，这是不很多见的，要不怎么我还没想自杀呢。常见的事是这个，稿子登出去，酬金就睡着了，睡得还是挺香甜。直到我也睡着了，它忽然来了，仿佛故意吓人玩。数目也惊人，它能使我觉得自己不过值一毛五一斤，比猪肉还便宜呢。这个咱也不说什么，国难期间，大家都得受点苦，人家开铺子的也不容易，掌柜的吃肉，给咱点汤喝，就得念佛。是的，我是不能当皇上，焚书坑掌柜的，咱没那个狠心，你看这个劲儿!不过，有人想坑他们呢，我也不便拦着。
这么一来，可就有许争人看不起我。连好朋友都说：“伙计，你也硬正着点，说你是为人类而写作，说你是中国的高尔基;你太泄气了!”真的，我是泄气，我看高尔基的胡子可笑。他老人家那股子自卖自夸的劲儿，打死我也学不来。人类要等着我写文章才变体面了，那恐怕太晚了吧?我老觉得文学是有用的;拉长了说，它比任何东西都有用，都高明。可是往眼前说，它不如一尊高射炮，或一锅饭有用。我不能吆喝我的作品是“人类改造丸”，我也不相信把文学杀死便天下太平。我写就是了。
别人的批评呢?批评是有益处的。我爱批评，它多少给我点益处;即使完全不对，不是还让我笑一笑吗?自己写的时候仿佛是蒸馒头呢，热气腾腾，莫名其妙。及至冷眼人一看，一定看出许多错儿来。我感谢这种指摘。说的不对呢，那是他的错儿，不干我的事。我永不驳辩，这似乎是胆儿小;可是也许是我的宽宏大量。我不便往自己脸上贴金。一件事总得由两面瞧，是不是?
对于我自己的作品，我不拿她们当作宝贝。是呀，当写作的时候，我是卖了力气，我想往好了写。可是一个人的天才与经验是有限的，谁也不敢保了老写的好，连荷马也有打盹的时候。有的人呢，每一拿笔便想到自己是但丁，是莎士比亚。这没有什么不可以的，天才须有自信的心。我可不敢这样，我的悲观使我看轻自己。我常想客观的估量估量自己的才力;这不易作到，我究竟不能象别人看我看得那样清楚;好吧，既不能十分看清楚了自己，也就不用装蒜，谦虚是必要的，可是装蒜也大可以不必。
对作人，我也是这样。我不希望自己是个完人，也不故意的招人家的骂。该求朋友的呢，就求;该给朋友作的呢，就作。作的好不好，咱们大家凭良心。所以我很和气，见着谁都能扯一套。可是，初次见面的人，我可是不大爱说话;特别是见着女人，我简直张不开口，我怕说错了话。在家里，我倒不十分怕太太，可是对别的女人老觉着恐慌，我不大明白妇女的心理;要是信口开河的说，我不定说出什么来呢，而妇女又爱挑眼。男人也有许多爱挑眼的，所以初次见面，我不大愿开口。我最喜辩论，因为红着脖子粗着筋的太不幽默。我最不喜欢好吹腾的人，可并不拒绝与这样的人谈话;我不爱这样的人，但喜欢听他的吹。最好是听着他吹，吹着吹着连他自己也忘了吹到什么地方去，那才有趣。
可喜的是有好几位生朋友都这么说：“没见着阁下的时候，总以为阁下有八十多岁了。敢情阁下并不老。”是的，虽然将奔四十的人，我倒还不老。因为对事轻淡，我心中不大藏着计划，作事也无须耍手段，所以我能笑，爱笑;天真的笑多少显着年青一些。我悲观，但是不愿老声老气的悲观，那近乎“虎事”。我愿意老年轻轻的，死的时候象朵春花将残似的那样哀而不伤。我就怕什么“权威”咧，“大家”咧，“大师”咧，等等老气横秋的字眼们。我爱小孩，花草，小猫，小狗，小鱼;这些都不“虎事”。偶尔看见个穿小马褂的“小大人”，我能难受半天，特别是那种所谓聪明的孩子，让我难过。比如说，一群小孩都在那儿看变戏法儿，我也在那儿，单会有那么一两个七八岁的小老头说：“这都是假的!”这叫我立刻走开，心里堵上一大块。世界确是更“文明”了，小孩也懂事懂得早了，可是我还愿意大家傻一点，特别是小孩。假若小猫刚生下来就会捕鼠，我就不再养猫，虽然它也许是个神猫。
我不大爱说自己，这多少近乎“吹”。人是不容易看清楚自己的。不过，刚过完了年，心中还慌着，叫我写“人生于世”，实在写不出，所以就近的拿自己当材料。万一将来我不得已而作了皇上呢，这篇东西也许成为史料，等着瞧吧。
Qingdao in May
It can have the same benefits pessimistic, get some things lightly. But this is my disadvantage, it don't work hard, do not actively. Do you think I love to laugh, because I am pessimistic. Pessimistic, so I can't pull the face, shouting: "lonely - Liu Bei!" I can't do this. The thought of this, I'll put the hair clucked his smile. Others looked at his beard, I numb from the backbone of the ditch, but not. I laugh at others, because I despise myself. Others laugh at me, I think it should be; that is good, I'm just a little bit of the monkey face. I often laugh at others, not willing to recruit people; others are not small, but not quite like me, so pessimistic.
I can't get up to the positive. This is my big problem. But I am not lazy, who I should I always want to take it as the, finally to reward points to feed themselves and home -- to said, do my duty. My pessimism has not yet to the extent of suicide, can not find something to do. Some day in the future feisibuke, it had to dead, I have what way?
So, you see, I have no ambition of people. I don't want to be an emperor. The most optimistic person to be emperor, I don't have the courage.
Some people say that I am very humorous, I don't deserve it. I don't understand what is humor. If you must ask me, I can only say that I feel funny, others are ridiculous; I am not higher than others, others are not higher than me. Who has a defect, who has a funny place. I told everyone said, but he was willing to tell me; he said he is a sage, call me sanguijiukou reported that the door and into, I didn't this addiction. I don't teach others, nor do I listen to others. According to humor, I think so, not Xipixiaolian, don't die nose.
Is not how such effort, I became a writer. My friend's account is Mr. Decheng shop to write writers, I told him the same, and called him brother. As a writer, of course, have to write. "Style is the man" - or "style is the donkey"? - I am www.vera-wines.org zgcglm.org www.wanxuetong.org www.guaguaka123.org www.guanlai.org www.meifuzhi.org www.w-tea.org www.jvhua.org www.chengdutaoka.cn www.fuzhoutaoka.cn www.chongqingtaoka.cn how to write about the nature of the article. So some people call me a humorous writer. I am not proud of this, nor do I take it as a disgrace. I wrote my. Sell out, there are more than five blocks of three, what to buy what to eat not sweet. Not sell it, leave it, I knew to write to eat is not easy.
Send the manuscript, sometimes it is dog meat, good; even there is no reply. This I had to humor; life see the swindler besides, see him, probably both of us total a smile to Hades the. However, this is not a lot to see, or how I haven't wanted to commit suicide. This is a common thing, it appeared, 'he fell asleep, sleep is very sweet. Until I fell asleep, and it suddenly came, as if deliberately scary to play. The number is amazing, it can make me feel that I am worth a gross weight of five one pounds, but also cheaper than the pork. The ZA don't say what, during the national calamity, we all have to suffer, others to open shop is not easy, treasurer of the meat to the ZA point soup drink, Buddha. Yes, I am not when the emperor, skoob pit dispensers, Za not the cruel, you see the strength! However, there is people want to pit them, I also the inconvenience to block.
As a result, there can be some people look down on me. Even your best friend said: "dude, you hard being a point that you are human and writing, say you are the Gorky in China. You are too discouraged!" really, I was discouraged, I read Gorky's beard and ridiculous. His son had killed I praise the goods one sells, also learn not to come. I'm afraid it's too late for me to write an article, and it's too late. But to say it in front of a statue, as anti-aircraft guns, or a pot of rice. I can't call my work is "human transformation pill", I do not believe that literature will kill Peace reigns over the land. I wrote it.
Criticism from others is good. I love criticism, it is much give me benefits; even completely wrong, not let me smile?? write as though he steamed buns, steaming, without rhyme or reason. When a person looks, must have seen many wrong. I appreciate this accusation. It's his fault, it's his fault. I never seem to be timid this disputation, but small; maybe I be kind and generous. I cannot flatter themselves. One thing must be looked at by both sides, is it not?
For my own work, I don't take them as baby. Yes, when writing, I was selling out, I want to write. But a man's talent and experience is limited, and who can't protect the old good, even Homer also have a nap. Some people, each pen will think he is Dante, Shakespeare. There is no need to be able to have a confident heart. I dare not so pessimistic, I make my own look. I used to think objectively estimate of his ability; it is not easy to do, I really can not like the others see me as well; well, both neither can very clearly see myself, also do not feign ignorance, modesty is necessary, but also greatly opossum can do not have to.
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To be a man, and so is me. I don't want to be a perfect, do not deliberately recruit people curse. And what shall be done for a friend, then shall he give his friend. Well, let's all be a good conscience. So I am very kind, see who can pull a set. However, at the first meeting of the people, but I am not very talkative, especially to see a woman, I simply does not open, I'm afraid wrong words. At home, I'd not very afraid of his wife, but the other woman old felt panic, I don't understand women's psychological; if say nonsense. I'm not sure tell what to do, while women love hypercritical. Men also have a lot of love elsewhere, so I am not willing to meet for the first time, opening. I most like the debate, because the red neck is thick with the muscle is too not humorous. I do not like a good man, but I do not refuse to talk with such a person; I do not love such a person, but like to listen to his blow. The best is to listen to him, and he also forgot to blow the place to go, that is interesting.
Fortunately, there are several students friends say so: "do not see your time, always think you have more than 80 years old. So you are not old." Yes, although it will be forty of the people, I'm not old. Because of things lightly, my heart not Tibet plans and work without cheating, so I can laugh, love to laugh; innocent smile how many are significantly younger. I am pessimistic, but do not want the old and pessimistic, the almost "tiger". I am willing to die when the elderly gently, like the spring flower will so mournful but not t.qq.com/cdsfd9966 t.qq.com/wwx1931848339 t.qq.com/zhou2423682140 t.qq.com/cqxykdaihuan t.qq.com/cqxyktaoxiangs t.qq.com/quxianchongqing t.qq.com/quxiankekao t.qq.com/qxquxiantx t.qq.com/ykcqtx890 .distressing like residue. I'm afraid of what's "authority", "everybody" grinning, "master" and so on. The words they act as an elder. I love children, flowers, cats, dogs, small fish; these are not "tiger"". Occasionally seen wearing a sleeveless shirt "little adults", can I suffered for a long time, especially that the so-called smart child, let me sad. For example, a group of children are there to see a magic show, I also in there, single would have so one or two seven year old old man said: "this is false!" this call me off at once, heart block on a large. The world is more "civilized", the child is sensible to know early, but I still want to be a little bit silly, especially children. If the cat was born will be catching, I will no longer keep cats, although it may be a cat god.
I don't love to say myself, how much is it almost "blow"". People are not easy to see their own. However, just over a year, in the heart is also a panic, called me to write "life in the world", it is not written, so close to take their own materials. If I have made the future emperor, this thing may be historical, wait and see.
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