I do it for your own good?!

Friday

I do it for your own good?!

我是为你好？！

 

During our lifetime, the sentence “I do it for your own good” comes along with the majority of people. Either some others tell you or you tell others. Subsequently, you just find out that sentence rather ironic and piercing.

一生中，“我是为你好”这句话伴随大多数人的一生，不是别人在对你说，就是你在对别人说！而后发现，“我是为你好”听着无比的讽刺与刺耳！

As I do it for your own good, you must appreciate the kindness and obey the command. If not appreciate, you will be the one who is unreasonable and lacking of common sense!

我是为你好，所以你必须要领情，你必须要听我的！而你不能不接受别人的好意，否则你就是不懂事，不明事理！

Even, among us many people live the shadow of their parents’ or family members’ “I do it for your own good” from infancy to maturity!

甚至，我们之中很多人从小到大活在父母亲人“我是为你好”的阴影下。

During childhood, we are curious about the various unknown objects. Commonly, our family members take good care of us and keep us away with the sentences—It’s so dirty that you stop touching. No touching or trying and it is very dangerous. Gradually, the young lose their interest in the outside world. Right here I want to ask who on earth do kill the creativity of our future national backbone! 

孩童时期，总会对各种各样未知的东西有种好奇心理，一般亲人们就开始展现关怀----“不要摸这个，这个脏。不要碰那个，那个危险。”慢慢，孩子对外界的好奇心也就越来越淡！此处我想问，到底是谁扼杀了未来国家栋梁的创造力！

 

For the sake of your benefit, you must play with the good students who get high scores and stay away from the so-called bad students who get low marks.

我是为你好，所以你必须跟成绩好的好同学玩儿远离成绩差的坏同学。

For the sake of your benefit,you must work hard to enter a superior university instead of your preferred music or painting.

我是为你好，所以你必须好好学习考上好大学，放弃你喜欢的音乐或是画画。

For the sake of your benefit, you must choose to study this major because your family can support your work after graduation. On the contrary, your ideal major is just unrefined and not accepted by them.

我是为你好，所以你必须读这个专业，家里有门路保障未来的工作，而你想学的那个终究登不了他们的“大雅之堂”。

For the sake of your benefit,you must choose to get married with their selected one. And you will certainly have a harmonious and happy marriage. But, love is not a mathematical question and not all one plus one equals two.

我是为你好，所以你要选择我们选定的那个人作为你的另一半，以后你们肯定会和和睦睦的，家庭幸福美满！可是，爱情不是数学题随便1+1=2！

 

When we grow up, we change from anoriginal victim to a present persecutor in the play of “I do it for your own good”. At the same time, you replace from the YOU to I.

当我们长大成年后，却又开始从“我是为你好”的受害者变成迫害者。从你曾经是“我是为你好”中的“你”变为“我”！

For the sake of your benefit, and you fear that your kids will lose in the starting line. As a result, you send them to various counselling training coursesin spite of their willingness.

我是为了你好，生怕孩子输在起跑线上，所以从小送他们去各种辅导培训班，罔顾他们的意愿！

For the sake of your beloved one’sbenefit, you will not take care of he/she if you don’t love!

我是为了你好，说要不是因为我爱你的另一半，我怎么会来理你，操心你的事情？！

And there are still a lot of similar examples as I do it for your own good. And you must act as my rules!

还有很多很多我是为你好，所以你必须要听我的，要按照我的来！

Whereas, in the past, you dislike being compelled to do anything. Later, you try to force others. As the ancient saying goes,please don’t do to others what you don’t want others do to you! If I’d like to eat green vegetables, it’s no use bringing me abalone and bird’s nest soup. If I want to put on comfortable and flat deck shoes, it’s no use comforting me with the beautiful high-heeled shoes!

可是，你从前不喜欢被别人逼迫，然后后来要去逼迫别人！古人云：己所不欲勿施于人！我想吃青菜，你拿来鲍鱼燕窝有什么用？我想穿着舒舒服服的平底帆布鞋走路就好，你送来美轮美奂的高跟鞋貌似会让我不舒服！

For the sake of your benefit,it’s exactly full of selfishness and controlling desire. And ignore others’ willingness and remain one’s own decision which doesn’t do good for you. Instead, it’s just commandeering and aggression as well as to make others compromise!

我是为你好，只不过是自私，控制欲作祟！把其他人的意愿抛弃，只留下自己的决定！这不是为你好，反而这是霸占，是侵略，是勉强别人！

For the sake of your benefit, it originates from you trying to do good for the other. However, do your original purpose act in accordance with the other party’s willingness? It’s not merely based on the idea that you are OK while the other is not OK. On the contrary, it is on the basis of both parties’ mutual satisfaction! 

我是为你好，源于我想为你好！可是，你的初衷和对方的意愿是不是相合？而不仅仅是出于你好对方不好的状态，反而应该是我好对方也好的基础上！

 

You and me are both independent individuals. And, no one has right to command others. Noone likesmoral kidnapping. As a result, please do not treat others with moral kidnapping!

我和你都是独立的个体，谁都没有权利去命令要求谁。没有人喜欢被道德绑架，那也不要去道德绑架别人！

If you try to do good for me, you should know how to cherish me instead of compelling me. If you try to do good for me,just do not embarrass me. Instead, you should encourage me and go through the difficulties together!

真的为我好，该知道如何珍惜我，而不是强迫我！真的为我好，就不是让我为难，而是与我鼓励我共渡难关！

From this day on, do say no to “I do it for your own good”! I don’t need anyone trying to show kindness to me. If you can’t behave as a certain way, just do not abduct and control one’s life with that hoax! 

从今日起，拒绝说--我是为你好！我也不需要谁刻意对我好，如果不能以我觉得好的方式对我好，不如就不要再打着“我是为你好”的幌子来绑架控制一个人的人生！

知识点

piercing 美 ['pɪrsɪŋ] 英 ['pɪə(r)sɪŋ]

n. （耳朵、鼻子或其他身体部位为戴首饰打的）穿孔

v. pierce现在分词

adj. 锐利的；逼人的；尖利的；刺耳的

例句：

She looked at me with piercing blue eyes.

她用一双敏锐的蓝眼睛盯着我。

The night was clear and starlight, but the wind had not fallen and cold was piercing.

夜间天朗气清，星光灿烂。但是风势并未减弱，而且冷气刺骨逼人。

persecutor 美 ['pɜ:sɪkju:tə(r)] 英 ['pɜ:sɪkju:tə(r)]

n. 迫害者；残害者

a person who treats another person or group of people in a cruel and unfair way

例句：

If your boss is a persecutor, for example, are you playing the victim?

比如，假设你的老板是个迫害者，那么你是否扮演了受害者的角色呢？

Respect yourself, or no one else will repect you!

要人尊重，必先自重！

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★ 作者：陈珺洁，感性与理性的融合，渴望汲取世间最美的精华，跨越世界去进行无止尽的修行！我在英语共读等你！