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盘子用完就洗还是攒多了再洗?来听听其中的区别 | TED演讲

相信每个人都有为之苦恼的不良习惯:拖延症、懒惰等等,有些无伤大雅,有些却在无形中阻挡了我们前进的脚步,甚至影响着身边的人……

I am guilty of stacking my dishes in the sink and leaving them there for hours.

如果把盘子都放在洗碗池里堆上好几个小时,我会有负罪感。

I fact-checked this with my boyfriend.

我向我的男朋友确认过。

He says it’s less like hours and more like days, but that’s not the point.

他说并不是好几个小时, 而是好几天,但这不是重点。

The point is sometimes I don’t finish the job until the stack has gotten high enough that it’s peaking over the lip of the sink and my inner clean freak loses it.

重点在于有时候直到碗盘已经堆积成山,超过洗碗池边缘了,我才去清洗它们,我的洁癖在它面前败下阵来。

This charming habit developed when I was in college, and I had tons of excuses.

我在大学时期养成了 这个“迷人的”习惯,而对此我有一大堆借口。

I’m running to class!

“我急着去上课!

What’s one more dirty dish in the sink?

“池子里再多一个脏盘子 有什么关系呢?

Or my favorite, 'I think I can save time and water if I do them all together later.'

还有我最爱的借口, “如果我攒到一起洗,就可以又省时间又省水。

But it’s not like I needed those excuses, because nobody was calling me on it.

但我并不是真的需要这些借口, 因为没人要求我解释。

I wish they had.

我倒希望有。

I look back now and realize that every time I didn’t put a dish in the dishwasher and finish what I started, it became more second nature to me, and I grew less likely to question why I was doing it.

现在回想这些,我意识到:每当我没有把盘子放入洗碗机中,并等待盘子变得干干净净时,我变得越来越习惯于此,也变得越来越不会去质疑 为什么我这么做。

Today, I’m a 30-something, certified dirty-dish leaver, and breaking this habit is hard.

现在,我是个30多岁的“资深不洗碗专家”,而改掉这个习惯却很难。

So when I’m not at home avoiding the sink, I work with large, complex organizations on leadership transformation in times of change.

当我没有在家里 对洗碗池视而不见的时候,我与一些庞大复杂的组织 一同致力于组织转型期的领导力变革工作。

My job is to work with the most senior leaders to examine how they lead today and establish habits better suited for the future.

我的工作是与一些 最高级别的领导打交道,评估他们今天是怎么领导他人的,并建立更适合未来的习惯。

But what interests me more than senior leaders these days is what’s going on with the junior ones.

但最近比这些大领导更令我感兴趣的,是在新晋管理者中所发生的事情。

We call them 'middle managers,' but it’s a term I wish we could change because what they are is our pipeline of future talent for the C-suite, and they are starting to leave their dishes in the sink.

他们被称作“中层管理者”,但这是一个我希望能够被换掉的术语。因为他们是未来核心管理层的中坚力量,而他们的洗碗池里却开始堆起了盘子。

While organizations are hiring people like me to redevelop their senior leaders for the future, outdated leadership habits are forming right before our eyes among the middle managers who will one day take their place.

在机构雇佣像我这样的人,为了未来改造他们的高级领导的同时,过时的领导习惯正在我们眼皮底下,在这群总有一天会取代 高级领导位置的中层管理者中形成着。

We need middle managers and senior leaders to work together, because this is a big problem.

我们需要中层和高层管理者共同努力,因为这是一个很大的问题。

Organizations are evolving rapidly, and they’re counting on their future leaders to lead with more speed, flexibility, trust and cooperation than they do today.

组织的变化日新月异,他们指望着未来领袖的工作会比今日更高速、更变通, 建立更多信任,促成更多合作。

I believe there is a window of time in the formative middle-manager years when we can lay the groundwork for that kind of leadership, but we’re missing it.

我相信在中层管理者的培养阶段,有一段时间是可以用来 培养这种领导力的,但我们错过了。

Why?

为什么呢?

Because our future leaders are learning from senior role models who just aren’t ready to role model yet, much less change the systems that made them so successful.

因为我们的未来领袖 正在以高层领导为榜样,而这些高层领导 并没有准备好成为榜样,更不用说改革帮助他们实现 今天的成就的整套系统了。

We need middle managers and senior leaders to work together to define a new way of leading and develop each other to rise to the occasion.

我们需要中层领导和高层领导携手共进,定义新的领导方式,互相促进以更好地应对挑战。

One of my favorite senior clients -- we’ll call her Jane -- is a poster child for what’s old-fashioned in leadership today.

我最喜欢的高级客户之一,我们叫她Jane,是今天被定义成过时领导力的典型代表。

She rose to her C-level position based on exceptional individual performance.

她爬到现在的核心领导层位置,靠的是出色的个人表现。

Come hell or high water, Jane got the job done, and today, she leads like it.

哪怕赴汤蹈火,她也能完成工作,现在,她也在沿用这种方式领导别人。

She is tough to please, she doesn’t have a lot of time for things that’s aren’t mission-critical, and she really doesn’t trust anyone’s judgment more than her own.

她很难取悦,没有时间分给那些“非关键任务”,而且她通常最相信自己的判断。

Needless to say, Jane’s in behavior boot camp.

毫无疑问,她正处于“行为训练营”中。

Those deeply ingrained habits are deeply inconsistent with where her organization is heading.

这些根深蒂固的习惯,几乎与她公司的发展方向背道而驰。

The command-and-control behavior that she was once rewarded for just isn’t going to work in a faster-moving, flatter, more digitally interconnected organization.

她曾经受到赞赏的高要求强控制型模式,在一个更多变、更扁平化、更数字化连接的 公司里,已经不适用了。

What got her here won’t get her there.

让她成功走到今天的方法, 无法让她走得更远。

But I want to talk about John, a supertalented, up-and-coming manager who works for Jane, because her habits are rubbing off on him.

但我想谈谈John,他在Jane手下工作,是一位 极具天赋、前途无量的主管,因为Jane的习惯会影响到他。

Recently, he and I were strategizing about a decision we needed to put in front of the CEO, Jane’s boss, and the rest of Jane’s peers.

最近,我们俩在为一个决策制定计划,这个决策是要交给Jane的上级,即CEO,以及其他Jane的同僚的。

He said to me, 'Liz, you’re not going to like this, but the way decisions get made around here is with a bunch of meetings before the meeting.'

他对我说:“Liz,你肯定不会 喜欢这种工作方式,但在我们这里做出决策,是通过开大会和大会之前的无数小会。

I counted.

我算了一下,

That was going to mean eight one-on-ones, exec by exec, to make sure each one of them was individually on board enough that things would go smoothly in the actual meeting.

这意味着八场一对一会议, 一个主管接着一个主管,来确保每个人都有参与其中。从而使得在最终的大会上 事情能进展顺利。

He promised, 'It’s not how we’ll do things in the future, but it’s how we have to do them today.'

他向我保证道, “这绝不会是我们未来做事的方式,但目前我们不得不这么做。

John wasn’t wrong on either count.

John在这两件事上都没有说错。

Meetings before the meeting are a necessary evil in his company today, and I didn’t like it at all.

大会前的小会,是他公司目前“无法避开的毒瘤”。而我一点也不喜欢。

Sure, it was going to be inefficient and annoying, but what bothered me most was his confidence

确实,这又低效又惹人生厌。但最让我担心的是他的自信,

that it’s not how they’ll do things in the future.

他对于以后他们不会这么做事的自信。

How could he be sure?

他怎么能如此断定呢?

Who was going to change it and when, if it wasn’t him and now?

如果不是此刻不是此人, 谁又会在何时来改变这一切?

What would the trigger be?

谁会成为那个导火索呢?

And when it happened, would he even know how to have effective meetings without pre-meetings?

而当它真的发生时,他真的会知道怎么能不通过 一堆小会来保证大会的效率吗?

He was confidently implying that when he’s the boss, he’ll change the rules and do things differently,

他自信满满地暗示当他成为领导时,他会改变规则, 用不一样的方式做事。

but all I could see were dishes stacking in the sink and a guy with a lot of good excuses.

但我能看见的, 只有堆在洗碗池的盘子,和一个有很多好借口的家伙。

Worse, a guy who might be out of a job one day because he learned too late how to lead in the organizations of tomorrow.

或者更糟糕,一个可能 有天会丢掉工作的家伙,因为他太晚才学会要如何领导未来的公司。

These stories really get to me when it’s the fast-track, high-potential managers like John because they’re probably the most capable of making waves and redefining how leaders lead from the inside.

这些故事让我真正受到触动的是像John一样的平步青云、 潜力无限的管理人员。因为他们或许是最有能力掀起风浪,重新从内部定义 领袖应如何领导的一群人。

But what we find is that they’re often doing the best job at not rocking the boat and challenging the system because they’re trying to impress and make life easier on the senior leaders who will promote them.

但我们却发现, 他们往往在稳定船舵固定系统上做得最好。因为他们想给能让他们晋升的高层领导留下好印象, 让生活更轻松一点。

As someone who also likes to get promoted, I can hardly blame him.

作为一个也想升职的人,我很难去指责他。

It’s a catch-22.

这是个进退两难的局面。

But they’re also so self-assured that they’ll be able to change their behavior once they’ve earned the authority to do things differently, and that is a trap.

但他们同时又如此信心满满,相信一旦他们得到权力,就可以挑战权威, 用不同的方式做事,而这是一个陷阱。

Because if I’ve learned anything from working with Jane, it’s that when that day comes,

因为如果要说我从和Jane共事中学到了什么,那就是当那天来临时,

John will wonder how he could possibly do anything differently in his high-stakes, high-pressure executive job without risking his own success and the organization’s, and he’ll wish it didn’t feel so safe and so easy to keep doing things the way they’ve always been done.

John会讶异于在他这样一个高风险、高压力的领导岗位上,如果不赌上自己和整个公司的前途,又怎么可能用不同的方法做事。然后他会庆幸, 继续维持原来做事的方法,感觉是如此安心又轻松。

So the leadership development expert in me asks:

因此,我心中的 领导力培养专家问道:

How can we better intervene in the formative years of our soon-to-be senior leaders?

我们怎样才能在即将成为 领导的中年管理层形成期,更好地加以干预?

How can we use the fact that John and his peers want to take charge of their professional destinies and get them ready to lead the organizations of the future, rather than let them succumb to the catch-22 that will perfectly prepare them to lead the organizations of the past?

我们怎样才能利用John和 他的同僚希望能主导自己职业命运这一点,使他们准备好领导未来的公司,而不是陷入一个进退两难的困境,一个只能让他们准备好领导过去的公司的困境。

We’ll have to start by coming to terms with a very real paradox, which is this:

首先,我们必须接受 一个现实中的两难局面。那就是:

the best form of learning happens on the job -- not in a classroom, not via e-modules.

最好的学习方法是在工作中学习,而不是在教室或是虚拟课堂中。

And the two things we rely on to shape on-the-job learning are role models and work environments.

而我们打造这种“工作中学习”模式 所依靠的两样东西,是榜样和工作环境。

And as we just talked about, our role models are in behavior boot camp right now, and our work environments are undergoing unprecedented disruption.

正如之前所谈到的,我们的榜样现在正处于 “行为训练营”里,而我们的工作环境 正经历着前所未有的瓦解。

We are systematically changing just about everything about how organizations work, but by and large, still measuring and rewarding behavior based on old metrics, because changing those systems takes time.

我们几乎在系统地改变所有事情,改变公司如何运转,但是大体上看,仍然是基于旧制度对行为进行奖惩,因为改变制度需要时间。

So, if we can’t fully count on role models or the system right now, it’s on John to not miss this critical development window.

所以,如果我们现在 不能完全依赖于榜样或制度,就只能指望John不要 错过这扇发展之窗了。

Yes, he’ll need Jane’s help to do it, but the responsibility is his because the risks are actually his.

诚然,他会需要Jane的帮助来完成,但他必须承担责任, 因为风险实际上是由他来面对的。

Either he inherits an organization that is failing because of stubbornly old-fashioned leadership, or he himself fails to build the capabilities to lead one that transformed while he was playing it safe.

他要么继承一个执着于过时的领导力而走下坡路的公司,要么他会因为打安全牌而无法掌握能够领导一个转型成功的公司的能力。

So now the question is, where does John start?

所以问题是:John要从何入手呢?

If I were John, I’d ask to start flying the plane.

如果我是John,我会先 要求开始自己驾驶飞机。

For my 13th birthday, my grandpa, a former Navy pilot, gave me the gift of being able to fly a very small plane.

在我13岁生日时, 我外公,一位前海军飞行员给我的礼物是, 让我驾驶一架很小的飞机。

Once we were safely airborne, the pilot turned over the controls, folded his hands, and he let me fly.

一旦我们安全升空,他就交出大权,完全放手让我来驾驶。

It was totally terrifying.

那真的很恐怖,

It was exhilarating, but it was also on-the-job learning with a safety net.

很令人兴奋,但同时也是 在安全网中进行的“在工作中学习”。

And because it was real, I really learned how to do it myself.

因为它是真实的,我真的学会了怎么自己操作。

Likewise, in the workplace, every meeting to be led, every decision to be made can be a practice flight for someone who could really use the learning experience and the chance to figure out how to do it their own way.

同理,在工作中, 每场要主持的会议、每个要做出的决定,都可以是一次飞行训练。让某人能真的用到 学习中的经验,抓住机会来找寻他们如何用自己的方法工作。

So instead of caving, John needs to knock on Jane’s door, propose a creative strategy for having the meeting without the eight pre-meetings, show her he’s thought through the trade-offs and ask for her support to do it differently.

所以比起畏缩不前, John需要的是敲开Jane的门,提出一个有创意的策略,能够不用开八次小会而直接开大会,在协调和平衡过程中 向Jane展示出他的思考,并向她寻求支持,用不同方式做事。

This isn’t going to be easy for Jane.

这对Jane来说并不简单,

Not only does she need to trust John, she needs to accept that with a little bit of room to try his hand at leading, John will inevitably start leading in some ways that are far more John than Jane.

她不仅需要信任John,还需要接受,如果给他一点点空间来尝试去领导,John会自然地开始用更带有个人特色,而非Jane特色的方式来进行领导。

And this won’t be an indictment of her.

这不是在谴责Jane,

Rather, it will be individualism.

恰恰相反,这会成为个人特色,

It will be progress.

会是一个进步。

And it might even be a chance for Jane to learn a thing or two to take her own leadership game to the next level.

也许还会成为Jane从中学习,并提高自己领导力的机会。

I work with another senior client who summed up this dilemma beautifully when we were talking about why he and his peers haven’t empowered the folks below them with more decision rights.

在我与另一位高级领导共事时, 他用一种优美的方式总结了这个困境,当我们谈论到为什么他和他的同僚,不给下属更多的决策权时,

He said, We haven’t done it because we just don’t trust that they’re going to make the right decisions.

他说,“我们不这么做是因为我们不相信他们会作出正确的决定。

But then again, how could they?

但他们又怎么可能做出呢?

We’ve just never given them decisions to practice with.'

我们从来没有给过他们练习的机会。

So I’m not advocating that Jane hands over the controls and folds her hands indefinitely,

所以我不是在提倡 Jane应该交出领导权,然后无条件放手。

but what I am saying is that if she doesn’t engineer learning and practice right into John’s day today, he’ll never be able to do what she does, much less do it any differently than she does it.

我想说的是:如果她在今日John的工作中,不给他学习和练习的机会,他永远都做不到她所做的,更别说用不同的方法做了。

Finally, since we’re going to be pushing both of them outside their comfort zones, we need some outside coaches to make sure this isn’t a case of the blind leading the blind.

最后,因为我们要求双方 都跨出各自的舒适区,我们需要一些“外围教练”,来确保不会变成双方都茫然不知所措的状况。

But what if instead of using coaches to coach each one of them to individually be more effective, we started coaching the interactions between them?

但如果我们的教练不是用来指导他们各自应如何更高效,而是指导他们如何互动呢?

If I could wave my magic wand, I would have coaches sitting in the occasional team meeting of Jane and her direct reports, debriefing solely on how well they cooperated that day.

如果能挥动我的魔法棒,我会让教练偶尔出席Jane和她下属之间的团队会议。会议上只是单纯汇报 他们那天的合作情况有多好。

I would put a coach in the periodic feedback session between Jane and John, and just like a couples’ therapist coaches on communication, they would offer advice and observations on how that conversation can go better in the future.

我会在Jane和John的定期 反馈会议中插入一个教练,就如同恋人之间的沟通治疗师一样。他们会对于在未来如何更好地进行对话,给出建议和观察。

Was Jane simply reinforcing what Jane would have done?

到底Jane仅仅是在强化 她自己会怎么做?

Or was Jane really helping John think through what to do for the organization?

还是真的为了公司,而帮助John思考要做什么。

That is seriously hard mentorship to provide, and even the best leaders need help doing it, which is why we need more coaches coaching more leaders, more in real time versus any one leader behind closed doors.

要提供这种指导确实很难,甚至连最好的领导也需要帮助才能做到,这就是为什么我们需要更多的 教练来指导更多的领导,更多地切合实际,而非闭门造车。

Around 20 years ago, Warren Buffet gave a school lecture in which he said, 'The chains of habit are too light to be felt until they’re too heavy to be broken.'

大约二十年前,沃伦 · 巴菲特 在一所学校演讲时,他说到:“习惯的锁链是如此之轻,“以至于直到它沉重得无法 被打破之前,都不会被发觉。”

I couldn’t agree more, and I see it happening with our future leaders in training.

我无比认可这句话,也看到了它出现在我们 对未来领导的培养中。

Can we and they be doing more to build their leadership capabilities while they’re still open, eager and not too far gone down a path of bad habits we totally saw coming?

在他们仍然保持着开放的心态、 充满热情,还没在那条我们早已预见到的满布陋习的路上走太远时,我们是否能一起帮助 他们打造领导力呢?

I wish my college roommates and I called each other out back then for the dishes.

我真希望我和大学室友 当时有互相提醒对方那堆脏盘子的存在。

It would have been so much easier to nip that habit in the bud than it is to change it today.

比起今天再来改, 把坏习惯扼杀在萌芽阶段要容易得多。

But I still believe in a future for myself full of gleaming sinks and busy dishwashers, and busy dishwashers, every day, together, moment to moment, one dirty dish at a time.

但我仍然相信我的未来 能有无数光洁闪亮的洗碗池和忙碌的洗碗工,我们现在正为之努力着,每一天,每一刻,共同携手,一次洗一个脏盘子。

Thank you.

谢谢。

英文来源:TED

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