中考英语复习之书面表达常见的毛病“诊断”和“疗法”

学生在做书面表达时往往会出现一些完全可以避免的毛病。下面以一次考试的书面表达为例，就学生所犯的典型错误进行分析，找出“病根”，并提出防治措施---“疗法”。

假如你叫李华，从XXX笔友栏目中了解到英国学生Jack想交中国笔友，你用英文给他写信。中心内容包括：出生年月，生活地方，个人兴趣，在校生活，未来志向等，并表示想了解对方的一些情况。

要求：词数60-80（开头和结尾已写好，不计入总词数。）

XXX Middle School

XXX Shandong, China

June 25, 2006

Dear Jack,

I’m glad to know from XXX that you want to have a pen friend in China. I’d like to be your pen friend…

Yours,

Li Hua

症状：

1、与题中提示不一致。

e.g. My name is Xu Tongtong. I study in No. 1 Middle School.

分析：审题不够仔细，匆忙下笔。用考生的真实姓名和学校是犯了大忌。

疗法：逐字审题，把每一个有用的信息标出来。如果把“你叫李华”和所给信头中的地址标出来并知道这应是你的地址，就可以避免此错误。

2、漏了要点和喧宾夺主。例如：有的未表达“想了解对方的情况”。这应该算漏点，是大失误，扣的分较多。有的写到：My sister is only 10. I own a small room. My parents work very hard. 这些都和交友没有关系，没有必要写，写了一是冲淡主题，二是造成时间的浪费。

分析：没有抓住重点。

疗法：确定主题后，把需要表达的要点一一画上符号。如果除所给的提示外还有表达的要点，要用笔写下来。最后，再检查一下，看是否有要点遗漏。

3、句型不正确，用了汉式英语。e.g. My study is not good. I want to know something about your like. I introduce myself. I like reading book. When is your born year?

分析：一是基本功差，句型没掌握好，没养成英语习惯，语感不强。二是没有仔细推敲，随意下笔。

疗法：平时要多听，多读，多背，多练，养成用英语思考和模仿英语说话习惯，培养语感，加强语法和词汇的学习。还要学会用正确的英语句型去表达你要说的东西。

4、动词时态和形式的病句。e.g. I lived in /I am living in /a city. Tell me your lives.

分析：时态意识差。

疗法：在写作时应根据语境考虑并确定好时态和形式。

5、写出一些令使用英语民族反感的句子。e.g. I think you are older than I. How old are your parent?

分析：不了解对方的文化背景。西方人忌讳问年龄和打听人家的隐私。

疗法：一是要了解并尊重使用英语的民族的文化背景，二是要紧扣要点写。

6、在不必要的情况下使用复杂句，使文章别扭或句式单一。e.g. My name is Li Hua, who lives in a small city in Shandong. I was born in … And I live in a city…. My father is a worker. And my mother is a worker. And I like sports.

分析：没必要使用从句。全部是简单句，并用了太多的and, 使短文读起来不连贯。写作时缺少斟酌，句式不熟。

疗法：平时要多看，多读和多背好的短文。注意句子之间的关系，要自然而不要牵强。

7、太“真实”太“具体”，以致不会表达的要胡乱编造。e.g. My hometown is Gededunzi of Fenghuangling, Linyi. My father works in the Shizhenggongsi.

分析：此信只是假设，并非要你填写档案。写如此长的汉语拼音，对方怎能理解。

疗法：避难就易，写普通的地名或单位就可以，不要“实事求是”。

8、单词拼写错误，汉语拼音用错。e.g. I was burned on April 24…Shang Dong. My pears are both teachers.

分析：单词掌握不好。

疗法：平时要注重单词的记忆和使用。避免使用没把握的单词。没my parents 可以用my father and my mother 来代替。地名的汉语拼音不能出错，题目中已给的。

9、介词，副词及近义词的误用。e.g. I am good in English. My parents are all teachers. In my family, I have a room of my own.

分析：注意词的正确使用。

疗法：如果在列提纲，定句型时，冷静联想一下：be good at , do well in , all and both, family and home 的区分，就会避免以上错误。

10、表达不得体，不合语境。e.g. Ok. Stop here. See you. I want you to come to my home in the holidays.

分析：以上的句子都非常正确但用的不是地方。第一句是用在口语里，写信不该用到。第一次同一个外国学生通信，就让对方到你家里去是不合适的。

疗法：动手写作之前，要通过审题，考虑好写作的目的，写作的对象和写作的文体，就可以避免类似的问题。

One possible version:

I am a boy named Li Hua. I was born in July, 1987. Both my parents are middle school teachers.

I live in a small city and I am a junior middle school student. I am in Grade 8 now。Our school is a beautiful place and I like it very much. I study Chinese, math, English, physics and so on. I am good at math. I like swimming and skating very much. I often go swimming with my classmates in summer. I want to be a math teacher in the future. How about your school and your family? Please write back to me and tell me more about yourself.

【模拟试题】

Nancy 要在12月9日举行一次自助餐（buffet），招待她的朋友们，希望他们晚上6点到，饭后打牌。她想邀请Anna和她的丈夫Bob.另外她还邀请了Clark和Smith两家人。假如你是Nancy,请写一封邀请函给Anna.

Dear Anna,

I’ll be expecting you on the ninth, so don’t disappoint me.

Yours,

Nancy

【试题答案】

One possible version:

Dear Anna,

I’m having a buffet supper on December 9. I want you and Bob to come. Come at six p.m., if you can. We’ll have supper first and play cards then. The Clarks and the Smiths will also come.

I’ll be exciting you on the ninth, so don’t disappoint me.

Yours,

Nancy