Security guard， truck driver， salesperson—year after year， these jobs appear on lists of the unhappiest careers. Although many factors can make a job dismal—unusual hours，low pay， no chance for advancement—these three gigs stand out for another reason: They're characterized either by a lack of conversation or by obligatory but meaningless small talk.
Psychologists have long said that connecting with others is central to well-being， but just how much conversation we require is under investigation. In one study，researchers eavesdropped on undergraduates for four days， then cataloged each overheard conversation as either “small talk” （“What do you have there？ Popcorn？ Yummy！”） or “substantive” （“So did they get divorced soon after？”）. They found that the second type correlated with happiness—the happiest students had roughly twice as many substantive talks as the unhappiest ones. Small talk， meanwhile，made up only 10 percent of their conversation，versus almost 30 percent of conversation among the least content students.
But don't write off chitchat just yet. Scientists believe that small talk （which linguists describe as a form of “phatic communication”） could promote bonding. Late last year， Princeton researchers reported that ring-tailed lemurs reserve their call-and-response conversations， akin to human chitchat， for the animals they groom the most—suggesting that small talk maintains closeness with loved ones， and isn't merely the stuff of awkward exchanges with strangers.
Still， bantering with strangers could brighten your morning. In a series of experiments， psychologists gave Chicago commuters varying directions about whether to talk with fellow train passengers. Those told to chat with others reported a more pleasant journey than those told to “enjoy your solitude” or to do whatever they normally would. None of the chatters reported being rebuffed. And the results held for introverts and extroverts alike—which makes sense， since acting extroverted has a positive effect on introverts.
Small talk can also help us feel connected to our surroundings. People who smiled at， made eye contact with， and briefly spoke with their Starbucks baristas reported a greater sense of belonging than those who rushed through the transaction. Similarly， one not yet published paper found that when volunteers broke the silence of the Tate Modern to chat with gallerygoers， the visitors felt happier and more connected to the exhibit than those who were not approached.
Of course， some of us are better than others at turning small talk into something bigger. In one study， people who were rated “less curious” by researchers had trouble getting a conversation rolling on their own， and had greater luck building closeness with others when they were supplied with questions that encouraged personal disclosure（“When did you last cry in front of someone？”）. But people who were deemed “curious” needed no help transforming conversations about mundane things like favorite holidays into intimate exchanges. A “curious mind-set，” the authors concluded， can lead to “positive social interactions.”
So go ahead， pry. Chitchat needn't be idle. And nosiness isn't all bad.
保安、卡车司机、推销员——年复一年，这些工作出现在最不快乐的职业排行榜上。尽管有许多因素可能会使工作沉闷——非正常的上班时间，低工资，没有晋升机会，但这三种活计引人注目是出于另一个原因：它们的特点是要么缺少对话，要么必须展开毫无意义的闲聊。
心理学家一直说，与他人建立联系对幸福感至关重要，但是，目前仍在研究我们到底需要多少对话。在一项研究中，研究人员对本科生进行4天监听，然后把听到的每段对话进行归类，要么是“闲谈”（“你拿的是什么？爆米花？好吃！”），要么是“实质性交谈”（“那他们后来很快就离婚了吗？”）。他们发现，第二类与快乐的感受相关——最快乐学生展开的实质性对话大约是最不快乐学生的两倍。与此同时，闲聊只占他们对话的10%，却在最不高兴的学生的对话中占到将近30%。
不过，别急着把聊天贬得一钱不值。科学家认为，闲聊（语言学家称之为一种“寒暄语”）能促进感情。去年年底，普林斯顿大学的研究人员报告说，节尾狐猴只与它们最经常为之理毛的同类进行类似人类聊天的应答式对话，这表明闲聊维系了与挚爱者的亲近感，而不单纯是陌生人之间的尴尬交流。
但是，与陌生人开玩笑还是会让你的早晨开心起来。在一系列实验中，心理学家围绕是否与同车乘客交谈的问题向芝加哥通勤者做出了不同指示。与被告知要“享受孤独”或者像平常那样行事的人相比，被告知要与别人聊天的人表示旅途更愉快。没有一个聊天的人表示自己碰了钉子。内向者和外向者的结果相似——这讲得通，因为表现得外向对内向者具有积极影响。
闲聊还能帮助我们感到与周边环境有关联。相对于匆忙买完东西就走的顾客，对星巴克的服务生微笑、与之有目光接触以及简短聊上几句的人表示自己更有归属感。同样，一份尚未发表的报告发现，当志愿者打破泰特现代美术馆的静寂与艺术爱好者聊天时，参观者会比没被搭讪的人更快乐，更有与展览相关联的感觉。
当然，我们中的一些人比其他人更善于把闲聊变成更有意义的事情。在一项研究中，被研究人员评定为“缺少好奇心”的人很难使交谈自然而然地进行下去，在拿到鼓励披露个人信息的问题（“你上次当着别人的面掉眼泪是什么时候？”）时更有望与其他人建立亲近感。不过，被认定为“有好奇心”的人不需要帮助就能把诸如最喜欢的节日之类的乏味话题转化为亲切交流。作者们得出结论认为，“好奇的心态”可以激发“积极的社会交往”。
所以来吧，打听吧。聊天未必毫无意义，好打听也不完全是坏事。（葛雪蕾译自美国《大西洋》月刊10月号文章）
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